Making Relationships Work
When a marriage has a shared sense of meaning, conflict is much less intense and perpetual problems are less likely to lead to gridlock.
Be completely humble and gentle; Be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the spirit through the bond of peace.
According to John Gottman, gridlock occurs when a conflict makes one feel rejected by one’s partner. They keep talking about it but make no headway, become entrenched in their positions and are unwilling to budge.
A love map is that part of one’s brain where one stores all the relevant information about one’s spouse’s life, such as their worries, hopes, and goals in life; their history; and the facts and feelings of their world.